Two nights ago, Selah had her first night in her "big girl bed." What does this entail? It means she slept in the crib instead of the bassinet. That also means she slept in her room, not ours. This milestone was harder on me than it was on her!
I was not expecting to get so emotional over this change. We are going to begin sleep training this weekend and I thought it might be a good idea to get her used to her crib before we actually begin the training. So when Sunday night came, we settled into our usual night routine: bath, book, prayer, nurse, sleep. However, when the moment came to place her into her crib, I was overwhelmed with tears as I realized my baby is growing up.
I know, I know... maybe I'm being dramatic. Again.
She is only 4.5 months old. She is still a baby. But she is my baby that doesn't sleep in her bassinet RIGHT next to our bed anymore. This change, albeit a small change, is the first of many to come. I left her room, the tears flowed as I cried into Caleb's shoulder and I remember thinking "and so it begins..."
It was strange to walk into our bedroom and not see her there. Her bassinet sat there, empty. Even though she was in the next room, it felt like she was missing from our lives. Remember, she has slept next to us for 4.5 months. She knows nothing different. And neither do we.
This is just one milestone we've reached as we learn to let go as Selah's parents. Even something as simple as moving her into the next room, is still a "let go" moment. I know there are many, many, many more moments that will come along in her life where Caleb and I will have to let go even more than the time before.
Although, I made the decision to "let go" of my child even when I was pregnant with her. She belongs to the Lord. She always has. And she always will belong to Him. Of course, letting go is no easy feat and is something I feel I will have to re-learn each time it comes along.
God has chosen us to be her earthly parents; we have been charged with this wonderful responsibility. And while we love her more than she will ever know, it's amazing to think her Lord loves her even more than we ever could. So naturally surrendering my child to the Lord is what makes sense to me, even those it is difficult. When we choose to have her dedicated to the Lord, that will be a very emotional ceremony for me.
Back to her first night in her crib, the good news is that she did incredibly well! She slept fantastically! We knew it was time to make the transition; she has become just about too big for the bassinet. We went in to check on her and somehow, she had rotated herself completely to the other side of the crib. I'm glad she has the extra room to sprawl out.
This weekend is sleep training. And let me tell you, this weekend could not get here fast enough! We've had something going on every single weekend for a month and a half. We wanted to dedicate at least 3 full days of sleep training and this weekend is the first weekend where we don't have much planned.
What exactly does sleep training mean? It means the main goal is to get our child to soothe herself to sleep. We have chosen a method and will be diligently working through it this weekend. Caleb is taking a day off work; that's how hard we are hitting this! I'll let you know how it goes :-)
Of course I'm biased, but isn't my kiddo the cutest thing in the world?
Ooo! Good luck! I remember watching the show Mad About You, and they were sleep training, and I do not envy what you are about to do. Ha. But just think how great it will be when you're done! You can do it!! And yes, she is precious!
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